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Diminia

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cry for the future [Friday
September 10th, 2010 at 7:00pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

i watched a beautiful monster's magic die today.
i suppose it's been dead for a long time.
i was unaware.

horrified.
and i can't place why.

i wanna be a better terror than you were.
but how can i best the best.

i'm much younger.
does that make it easier?

your voice still tears out my heart.
fuck you.
i hate you.
and i love you.
but mostly i resent you.

so long...

-----------


ah what's up livejournal...? Anyone still here? I've got some secrets for you. ;)

[11] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

it's too soon to scrap memories... [Friday
December 18th, 2009 at 10:30pm]
[ mood | calm ]

uhm hi...Collapse )

yeah... yeah i know lj land. i've totally abandoned you. sorry. i'll try to get something together. i've more time now since i'm on winter break. no promises though.

probably a photodump soon regardless. november was an epic month concert-wise.

i miss you guys. i have a lot i feel like i need to tell you about. haha. well, until next time. love youssss...

[4] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

too bad. [Sunday
November 15th, 2009 at 3:01pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

we're going to leave for chicago when Ruki gets here. embark on a dir en grey adventure if you will. it will be my first experience camping out for a band. honestly i'm terrified. not of the obvious danger of camping on the street in an unfamiliar city, but of being cold and of being disappointed.

i'll try to stay positive.

hopefully this will be one of the greatest experiences ever. so far i've had some crazy witchcraft on my side for the past few weeks. it better deliever. heh.

uuuuugh. i don't even know what to do with this tme waiting to leave. i feel like i'm in limbo.

anxious anxious anxious.

november has been interesting. i'll tell you all about it when i get back.

Cue the Pulse to Begin

spare us the rescue... [Wednesday
November 4th, 2009 at 9:36pm]
[ mood | calm ]

wow. surprised i went the whole month of october without posting a single thing. that's my favorite month. shame on me.

surprisingly the reason for this is that real life has gotten a tad hectic. if i'm not at school or work i'm at a show, or with the qaffam or desperately avoiding homework. needless to say it may be time for me to grow out of my own world of internet drama. i still check my friends list often, but i don't really feel the need to post. i don't know if you guys really miss my updates anyway. they are fun for me to look back on years later but i really don't know.

since my last update i've been to a few shows, met a few famous people, got a new tattoo, and made some big decisions. i am volatile person. changing faster than i can keep track of.

...and my bff made me a delicious dinner with peanut butter cookies for dessert. i am so lucky.

news items:

my hair is still orange.

&

these people...Collapse )

[4] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

score one for the assholes. [Tuesday
September 15th, 2009 at 3:32pm]
[ mood | sick ]

bwahahaha. so i'm totally sick and have definitely been asleep alllllll day except for one hour of that day but... when i woke up i noticed Gabe had tweeted a clip of Pete being an a-hole at the VMA's which reminded me Pete's shirt was a clandestine design so i decided to check if they had something similar over there at the shop. yup. just bought it. hahahaha.

in other news i feel like my head's in a clamp. boooooh. please forgive my crappy writing, hard to focus and whatnot.

Cue the Pulse to Begin

hurrah for labor day. [Tuesday
September 8th, 2009 at 10:05am]
[ mood | sore ]

i wish it weren't so dreary out. although dreary is my favorite kind of day if the ground is wet then i can't sit on it and i still have an hour to kill before my next class. and i hate the student union and i have no friends on campus rn. ugh. i didn't bother to make any this semester because honestly i don't care and even the ones i intend to stay in contact with tend to get forgotten, or they don't contact me. and i'm stubborn. xp

so yeah. this weekend Toshi and i drove out to MI to visit Ruki. it was super duper fun. we didn't do aaaaanything. just lazed around and hung out. there was some mario in there and some drinkies and watching of TRTA and Toshi got her industrial pierced. yey! not to mention Keikei was there. hell yeah 2 for 1. love it. it was super nice to see them again. and it got my jrock love all fired up again. as per usual. and on the way home we stopped by Miku's for a few hours. extra added bonus. and that got my cosplay love all fired up again. haha.

so in short i love them and i miss them and i hope we get to hang again soon.

i miss the qaf fam too. i wanna chill out with those kids and hookah it up soon too.

[forgive my retarded writing style. i don't care to be cryptic or eloquent right now. deal.]

[1] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

[Saturday
September 5th, 2009 at 3:35pm]
[ mood | content ]

..............so i really wanted a dermal anchor until i watched some videos of people getting it done. that is some HARDCORE shit. and i'm a baby. so i need to work myself up to it and not do it on a whim. yeah. ouch. o__x

in other news, hay neglected journal. i'm off to MI. i know i promised you cobra pictures. laaaater. :p

Cue the Pulse to Begin

epic month of epicness. [Thursday
August 6th, 2009 at 11:39am]
[ mood | excited ]

so basically the past month has been a lot of awesome. i don't even know where to begin. so i'm just gunna photodump with a few words here and there. there's going to be a different entry entirely devoted to the cobra show i just went to because i still don't have my pictures on the computer from that one yet.

so lets start with june 19th, when the other other other half of my soul came to see and show and visit me.

you're a hot mess and i'm falling for you...Collapse )

onto july 12th. there are no pictures from this although i wish there were... Kai, Akari, Tosh and i went to see VNV nation in cleveland at peabodys. first of all just let me say that the intense goth fail i saw there was atrocious. but it was very good for the lulz. the first band failed hard. the second band War Tapes was musically good and vocally not. the vocalist was creepy beyond all reason and he took a liking to Kai and i. by that i mean got right up in our faces and sang to us. i never want someone all up in my koolaide singing "love me" unless i already love them. ick. anyway once they left and VNV took the stage it was pretty epic.

i had no idea what to expect for this show but it was intense the music was sooooo good live. i didn't really expect it to be but they did an amazing job. and Ronan was really funny and endearing and even though he's a chubby Irishman and kinda looks like Andrew Zimmern he is super cute. so they rocked it hard and because it was such a small club and they couldn't have their video screens up they told us they'd play songs for us they hadn't played on other shows. they definitely delivered. even with an impromptu performance of Electronaut. and they played for a solid 3 hours.

meanwhile Akari and Kai had left and Kai came back to grab Tosh and i during the last song. Tosh went to look for Akari and Kai and i went to look for VNV. Kai spoke to the vocalist of war tapes, whose name was Neil and was apparently a very nice person when he wasn't being a creeper mcmuffin , and he literally took us up to the tour bus, knocked on the door and coaxed Matt out for us. so we got our stuff signed, had a brief conversation, hugs. Matt is MASSIVELY tall. and very nice and funny too. with a beautiful English accent.

after meeting him and few more people saw he was out so they started crowding so Kai and i backed up to stand near the front of the bus and wait for Ronan. eventually he did come out and when we spoke to him he was so kind and down to earth and actually took time to have a real conversation with us. honestly, probably the kindest famous person i've ever met. he gave us hugs and we departed.

the rest of the evening was not as cool so i'll leave it at that.

the next thing, NEVERSHOUTNEVER! july 17th. :DDDDD

too much for one kid to handle.Collapse )

and then we have some random day. idrk what day it was but Sisky business and William Beckett had been tweeting the night before about having a day off in Akron and the QaF fam was like "WTF?! our Akron?" but we didn't really expect much of it. but then the next day Sisky tweeted again that if you wanted to meet William to come to the Barley house. so we did. and well. we met him. HAHA. and we had a conversation about the most metal ways to die. they had some very very very long and involved one worked out.

Sisky's tweeted picture and oursCollapse )

and yeah... then we just recently went to Cobra but that will get it's own entry later. for now the end of the photo dump.

stuff i forgot to postCollapse )

the end. thanks for putting up with that intensely long and likely full of mistakes rant.

[3] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

memeing it up. [Saturday
July 4th, 2009 at 11:39am]
[ mood | happy ]

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. You can't use the band I used. Do not repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think!

i wanna use two artists. so yeah. XD

here's to the indecisive.Collapse )

Cue the Pulse to Begin

so true... [Wednesday
June 10th, 2009 at 12:12pm]
[ mood | amused ]



ahahahahahhaaaa!

Cue the Pulse to Begin

... [Wednesday
June 10th, 2009 at 11:08am]
[ mood | angry ]

i can't believe it.

i requested to see an adviser a long time ago.
apparently because i'm an English major i can see only one person...
who happens to be a flake.

a huge flake.

so i figure if this dbag doesn't get back to me in what i consider to be a reasonable amount of time i'll just do what i do and figure it out myself.

[i just wanted the luxury of not having to think about it.]

so i'm thinking it's about time to enroll on my own without his help.

and he's placed a hold on my account.

i can't enroll until he advises me or takes the hold off.

i requested an adviser. that doesn't mean i need one.

i'm livid.

[3] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

impressed. [Wednesday
June 3rd, 2009 at 12:12pm]
[ mood | impressed ]

"nostalgia is the failure of true emotion.

It’s a crazy concept. Because it’s only human for us to want to keep a box of memories and pictures and things, and open them back up to have them transport us to that place we were when they were taken. But – and I know this is really fucked up—but I think when you do that, it makes you leave your emotions in the past and precludes you from truly immersing yourself in the present. I think that’s why people get old: Because they’ve left pieces of themselves behind."

i had no idea such a mind lurked behind those eyes. sure i had suspicions but i never really knew. bravo sir, well played.

Cue the Pulse to Begin

we'll watch the stars go out. [Wednesday
May 27th, 2009 at 11:52am]
[ mood | blank ]

Photobucket

a sign of life. a sense of change.

i realized i've been lurking and never posting or acknowledging i still exist.
i cut off all my hair.
i hate it.

i turned 20.
nothing exciting.

made a new friend.
who will put needles to my skin on friday.
[finally finishing the guns. maybe. i hope.]

will see Matt Ivan tonight.

it's gloomy. it suits me.

[4] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

always up or down... [Wednesday
April 15th, 2009 at 11:54am]
[ mood | sick ]

Photobucket

this is the first legitimate "sick day" i've had in almost 2 years.
i didn't go to class.
i called off work.
i have a doctor's appointment at 2:50.
[which i'm beginning to dread.]

i feel calm though,
despite my various afflictions.

monokuro boo is my snuggle buddy. i hate sleeping alone.

[4] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

new, you're so new. [Monday
April 6th, 2009 at 5:24pm]
[ mood | happy ]

so basically a few epic things happened rapid fire.

for one,

Photobucket

i went to a great acoustic concert and met William Beckett.

moreCollapse )

[5] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

the world don't know i'm alive. [Thursday
March 26th, 2009 at 9:52am]
[ mood | content ]

i am convinced that Lexi is a good luck charm.

she came home last night and miraculously i got a good night of sleep. not to mention Gene finally contacted me again. looks like that leather jacket of his is now mine. [granted he doesn't pull one over on me but i doubt it.] all i gotta do is tell him when the money order is in the mail and he'll ship. ::squirm::

[that should be friday. i can't make it to the post office until then. and even that's gunna require some heeeeelp!]

just sold my soul for a leather jacket and everything feels allllll right. <333333

[1] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

tide changing, i'm waiting. [Tuesday
March 24th, 2009 at 9:27am]
[ mood | anxious ]

uuuugh. i woke up around 7ish when Toshi left and due to some overwhelming anxiety i couldn't fall back into sleep. i don't know why but my throat feels all clenched up.

i think i've been having a series of mini breakdowns lately. i'm not too sure why. x__x

green eyes, blue skies, natural disasters when she cries. green eyes, they're mine. it's only a matter of time.

despite all of this ickyness i'm mostly okay. i must be bipolar because it's so sudden and unexplainable. oh well. oh well. like everything else, i'll survive this too.

Cue the Pulse to Begin

xxx [Monday
March 23rd, 2009 at 7:35pm]
[ mood | determined ]

oh. my. god. Gene is selling his lock.

Gene is selling it.

i want it so bad.

currently the bid is at $155. the bidding ends tomorrow. if it's not much higher than that, i WILL buy it. this is one piece of him that i would die to own. what's a couple hundred dollars. ugh. fandom... leave me alone.

...the new song is pretty sweet too.

Cue the Pulse to Begin

blood market, love market. [Saturday
March 21st, 2009 at 8:39am]
[ mood | tired ]

it's funny how the rediscovering of a long lost love can remind you of a long lost hate.
or a not so long ago lost hate.

there is never a time to move on when the scar's this deep.



just taking what you're given isn't enough.
fuck, i learned my lesson too late.


----

we leave for Pittsburgh soon enough. the hotel has a sauna. i'm excited about that at least. i hope i find something interesting to bring back with me. spring break has been a bust, except for all the sleep i have been catching up on. of course now that i can sleep in, i've been up since 6:30 AM. i didn't sleep well either. BOO HISS!

oh well THIS WILL BE A BRILLIANT END TO A RESTFUL WEEK.

QaF fam, i miss you bbz. i look forward to our reunion.

tattoo, i'll be getting you monday so just you fuckin' wait. grrrr.

[2] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

something of substance... [Thursday
March 12th, 2009 at 9:26am]
[ mood | impressed ]

later. for now,

Photobucket

UNF UNF UNF! Ruki is like my new obsession. i gotta quit it with that. [i mean i passed up Miyavi scans and went straight to Gazette!]

okay. time to go to take a test. sorry f-list. haha.

[3] Should Like Getting Ahead | Cue the Pulse to Begin

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